Sunday, 26 April 2015

Please help Nepal!

Please help Nepal by donating a certain sum to the red cross, here is a link. Thank you for helping!

In Finland: it's easy, I just sent a text SPR to number 16499 and gave 15 euro.

Laitoin juuri 15 euroa tekstarilla SPR:n katastrofirahastoon. Oli helppoa, se menee näin: tekstaa SPR numeroon 16499. Kiitos kun autat!

Saturday, 25 April 2015


Today I baked apple-roses and planted some violets in my garden. The apple-roses were made using this recipy. Since I do not have a microwave, I squeezed a lemon in water and boiled the apple slices for a few minutes. The only tricky thing was to make sure not to press the apple slices out when rolling the pastry. So I had to re-do my first roses due to the slices falling off, I also made the pastry strips slightly wider, as to make sure the slices would secure better once I started rolling. I do not own a muffin cup but I had some muffin cups in paper in my cupboard. Fun! And delicious. Not too sweet either.

I saw these violets in the grocery store today and I immediately fell for them, now they live in the old basket on the gardenchair.

This year, in Lovisa, we have a small project called doors for the little people (?). Not sure the term is correct, I've only heard the term in finnish pikkuväki and in swedish småfolket. So there will be small doors inside houses and outdoors, in the gardens and on housefacades, on gates and stone bases. My two doors are pictured in this article. The one on the left, well, rumours say it was built the same year my house was built, in the year 1900. Then there was a lot of love in the air and the dearest of all moved in 1934, hence the year on the door. As you can see, mezeron is in bloom, it still grows in the garden. Except the evil Fröken Wiklund who now lives in the house will extirpate the plant in her garden. Because it is so toxic. The berries can easily kill an adult. The blue door again has another story...
My friend Maria who is the lady behind the project, said she was sorry our names were not mentioned in the pictures.
I have a few doors in the making, so not sure which ones will be in the project yet.

Me and L have been working in the garden. Moving old timber, old broken doors, stuff that cannot be saved, into a pile that I shall take the garbage station soon. But I shall not yet work on the garden, it is what it is, but I try to keep it tidy and in control. If I don't cut down some plants, they will take over. I have so many lilacs, I could start exporting and save Finland's economy!

Tuesday, 21 April 2015

Messages in shopwindows

Today when I walked home, I spotted this sign in a shopwindow.
I say YES to new adventures! I've never been the scared kind, I've been very spontaneous and that's what's brought me here today. I don't want to regret NOT doing something.

Last yoga for this spring. Luckily I'm quite good at doing yoga by myself. I just need to get into the routine.

Slightly askew

Everything is slightly askew.
But that seems to be the way I like it, as almost everything in my home is slightly askew. A wonderful word.

Above is muji cd-player. I've had this for years and I still think it is fab. I bought the Anna Puu cd from a local store for just a few bucks, I enjoy some of her songs, especially this one. The video for it is great, the dance/ acrobatic choreography is beautiful.

Sunday, 19 April 2015

Butterflies, butterflies and even more butterflies. And Election day!

It's the Finnish parliament elections today.  I have always voted and hopefully I always will be able to. Something I feel proud to do. As a woman. As a citizen. Not everyone has this right. And it is something my ancestors have fought for. And I always enjoy a cake and coffee afterwards. There was no café open in this small town today, so I had to get the cakes from the shop. There was no other sort. Banana-republic, hih!

After I had voted, me and L took a stroll to see an exhibition he has wanted to see for a long time, me too, for that matter. It is by a photographer called Niclas Warius. He creates stillebens and they are all very beautiful. We enjoyed all the pictures, but we agreed that a coffetable book would be perfect for this sort of art. It was nice to see the sort of stillebens I often create in my own home, pictured. There were dresses hanging, dried flowers, vintage objects...

I don't seem to be able to have a home without my butterflies.
I first had my butterflies here. And then here. Then in the lovely shoebox. And now here in my house as seen above.

 I also made a butterfly "wallpaper" for my friend Malin. Here I used many butterflies as I happened to have many at the time. Usually I only use half the amount to create the Ninitchi butterfly "wallpaper". The idea came from a comment I heard that if you rent an apartment you cannot make anything nice or put your own touch to it. So I created something that doesn't ruin a plain painted wall, once you want to remove the butterflies you just wet them and after a few minutes you can remove them and there's no mark or stains left on the wall. The Ninitchi butterfly "wallpaper" butterflies are made of old booksheets. Very easy.

Friday, 17 April 2015

During the week

On wednesday L and I were invited to our friend Maria. Oh my. We were all spoiled by wonderful tales, Maria is such a wonderful storyteller. Right now she is writing a book, and we were spoiled by fantastic details of the stories and enjoyed wonderful chocolate cakes and sparkling wine. It was delicious and dangerous. The chocolate cakes served were out of this world. The most dangerous cake was called a "chocolate bomb". It had a chocolate cover, inside chocolate mousse and the base was meringue. Once you took a bite it melted...oh my! I secretly dream of that chocolate bomb! Some of the guests serenaded our hostess with beautiful songs. We cykled home feeling spoiled when we recalled the evening,  all the guests and that we have such wonderful friends.

Last night we attended a small venue, at an old estate called Rutumin kartano. Our friends Rita and Denise performed with their duo Agricolas döttrar. After the performance the hostess of the estate introduced the main building and it's wonderful history going back to year 1700. We were then served coffe and tea, small pastries and cakes. The guests were mainly locals from this small village and it was so sweet when they asked how far we had come and who we were. A small elderly lady sat next to L and told him she had lived across the road to the estate her whole life, and that she had played with the children of the estate and even learned swedish due to this friendship.

Later we sat in my kitchen, lit the candles in the chandelier and drank some more tea. That is when I took the picture seen above. The candlelight reflecting in my etched window.

Sunday, 12 April 2015

Waffles under the chandelier

Today I brought this baby home. An antique french church chandelier. This is not the final place for it, this is above my stove in the kitchen. But there happened to be a hook in the ceiling, so I hung it there. Of course I had to try it! It gives such a wonderful light.

My parents paid a visit. We made waffles, with whipped cream and raspberry jam and drank coffee.  So delicious!

Today was a wondeful day. I predict that a certain someone falls asleep happy.

I think Sia sings about another sort of chandelier, but I have been humming to this... hih!

Saturday, 11 April 2015


Just in for a short brake, to sit down for a moment, drink a glass of juice.
Then I shall change clothes, I shall take my two wiener chairs outdoors, give them a slight rub with sandpaper and add some dark stain and finish off with wax. At the moment they are too light for my taste. I believe them to be from the 90's. They are of good quality so hence I want to give them new life. It's perfect weather to work outdoors. I'll show you the outcome once they are ready.

Above is a framed card of a Modigliani painting. Many years ago I was teareyed at a small museum in London when I suddenly stood in front of a real Modigliani painting. It was smaller than I had expected, so warm and beautiful. I posted this same image on fb and haf a short dialogue with a friend, also told about my meeting with the painting in the museum. She posted this link: HIH!

Friday, 10 April 2015

The weekend is here

 Last night we saw Viirus theatre perform a political satire I valet och kvalet at the Lovisa gymnasium. I laughed so much I once again almost fell of the chair...I wasn't the only one!
And I won at the lottery! L bought some lotterytickets, and a few in my name, sweet. I won a smoke-detector. How handy is that. Lucky me!

We decided to have some sushi today, so lovely to end a busy day and week with delicious food.
The week has indeed been busy and intense, so I wanted to stay at home tonight, decided to stretch and do some light yoga poses and relax. This asana is Viparita Karani. It is easy and so relaxing.

Wishimg you a relaxing weekend!

Monday, 6 April 2015

Still Alice

We saw it tonight. I cried. So did L. And he held my hand. And he put his arm around me when I felt it was really hard. There is so much that resembles my mother.
She wrote a few books, she often held lectures, she was very active withing the arts, she was a social person, had many friends. She loved to cook and entertain guests, she read so much, she was involved in politics, she traveled. She dressed very well, people always complimented her on her choice of clothing, she always had the same colour handbag as shoes, she was very kind. A wife. A mother.
She is still a very kind and warm elderly lady. With alzheimer's disease.

Here is the trailer.

Sunday, 5 April 2015


I found the perfect frame at the fleamarket and had some black spraypaint at home, so it only took me a while to paint and cut the picture to fit the frame.

Earlier today we enjoyed brunch at restaurant Bella today and then cykled about and paid a visit to my dear friend Kaisa, whom I lived next to when I rented a house by the shore. She is a potter and she has her studio open during the easterholidays. She makes the most wonderful ceramics. I have lots of her work.


It has been lovely to have a little holiday.
Yesterday and the day before, we cykled about, watching the nature waking up to spring,

Yesterday we rambled through two flea-markets. I found an old photograph, I think it might be from the 70's. The size is a little larger than an A4, por slightly smaller than an A3, hih!
It was (in my opinion) over-exposed, so I tinted it. The building I tinted is the Pilasters mansion in Lovisa. The building to the right no longer exists. I shall find a black frame for it. I think it turned out just perfect - as I think the original was just perfect too.



In the evening we visited our friend Rita. She also renovates an old house, she is wonderful, she has saved an old house again! We drank strong coffee, ate cheeses and crackers and fudge and she sang for us by her piano and we sat by the candlelight and had goosebumps as it was all so wonderful, what a wonderful life!

Even later in the evening we decided to meet up with some friends in a bar and listen to our friend Kalle perform. We had a couple of beers and rode home in springrain.

I fell asleep happy.

Now I cannot stop listening to Norah Jones. I love this song. 

Friday, 3 April 2015

Friends and food

Last night me and my friends Maria and Mayank made rawfood "lasagna". I love rawfood! It is very easy to make and if any of you want to try it, here is the recipe.
We had raw chocolate for desert, and drank ginger tea and talked for hours and hours. I am blessed with wonderful friends.

Now it's time to start preparing easter-food. I am making a feta-spinach-quiche, yes I know it is very last season - so 80's! But, I had a piece last week and it was flavoured with nutmeg, which is perfect with spinach, I use it when making spinach sauce or as a sidedish. So of course it makes a difference when used in a quiche! I was planning to add a green salad with vinegrette sauce. For lunch.

For dinner I'm making lentilsoup with both dried and fresh coriander, cumin and coconutmilk. And bread with butter.

We shall also enjoy our traditional delights as mämmi and pasha.

Above is my easter-bouquet. Red tulips with branches of lilacs I cut last weekend. As a vase I have a jug my parents once brought as a gift from france. An iranian potter named H. Vahdat, whom made the most wonderful pottery. I also have a few other pieces.

Time to invite wonderful Billie Holiday to sing in my kitchen, cook, lit some candles and love love love. What more can one wish for! Happy easter to my christian friends! Happy long holiday to my non-christian friends!

Thursday, 2 April 2015

Happy Easter

Wishing you all a happy easter!

Eat plenty chocolate eggs, but please, try to look for the certified easter-eggs. Let us together make sure that we do not support trafikking.

Here is a link for more information, and also links for the UK and Australia. Here is a link for finnish readers.

Above is a lovely Easter-card I received from a dear student.

Monday, 30 March 2015

Holy cow, it's raining...

...WET snow. Yak! Everything is wet, my red beret, my glasses, my mittens, my coat, my shoes, my bag, my knees!
One can still enjoy the fairylights in the storm lantern...

Friday, 27 March 2015

Weekend again!

I cannot understand how fast the weeks and days pass. It is weekend again!

Anna Järvinen's concert is still here with me, her songs on my skin.

As extreme waffle-enthusiasts we are sad to have to inform you we did not have time to make waffles on Vårfrudagen (also known as waffleday 25th of march), but this will be compensated during the weekend, I promise!

Above is an antique flour jug I found in a charity shop. It was in their window for a long time, I often passed it and thought it beautiful, yesterday I decided to ask how much it costs. It was cheap and it is perfect for herbs in my kitchen window.

Have a wonderful weekend dear friends!

Thursday, 26 March 2015

Descendant of a peasant

Last night, me and L, saw Anna Järvinen in consert at Tavastia in Helsinki.

Again, it was such a wonderful treat to hear her live. I have seen her two previous concerts in Helsinki and always felt her songs fill me with love. I was happy! I AM happy!

Here is Nattmusik, enjoy!

Above is a sentence, the greeting to end a speech held by the representative of the peasant class, (adressed to the Grand Duke of Finland, Nicholas II of Russia) held at Parliament in year 1900. In finish. It is hilarious, as one would never adress anyone like this anymore. 115 years later I laugh at how my ancestors had to humiliate themselves. At the time we had a very strict class society, the peasants being the poor working class. In some aspects, nothing has changed. The poor still have to humiliate themselves in many ways. For example when your salary for your work is not enough to live on and you are forced to apply for social welfare. It is wrong.
It is soon our parliamentary elections. This matter is also one of the aspects I consider when choosing a candidate. Animal rights is also something I find important. 

Wednesday, 25 March 2015


...just a little reminder!

Last night... and L cykled under a dark sky, filled with stars and a crescent moon. We stopped and admired the beauty. And we managed to name a few constellations.

And we have totally fallen in love with this sexy guy, Tommy Krångh, and his wonderful sign language interpretation of one of the songs participating in the swedish eurovision song contest. This is not the song that will represent Sweden. 

Above is an antique kitchenscale I received as a christmasgift from L. The little portrait is a gift from my mother.

Friday, 20 March 2015

Fascinating times

During the week we have been able to see shooting stars and northern lights. If you looked up in the sky. At night. Well, unfortunatley it was not at all that simple. Where I live it was faaaaar too light at night. I spotted loads of stars, but was unsure if I spotted any shooting stars, maybe I was trying too hard and was  hence unsure. So I kept wishing, just to be on the safe side - one does not want to miss an opportunity to wish upon a star, if there is one.

But I only saw northern lights through friends photos posted on facebook. Wonderful!

Today I watched the solar eclipse through a dark lens, but I missed the exact moment, but I saw the sun when a little corner of the sun was covered, as if someone had taken a bite of a biscuit.

Yesterday I met up with my dear friend T and we saw Slava (the link is in finnish) at the National Theatre. My goodness what a play. I so enjoyed it!

Above is a vintage school poster.

Wednesday, 18 March 2015


Early morning.

Drinking coffee on the stairs, in the sun. A woolen throw keeping me warm. The air is crisp.
Heard the swans have returned.

Sunday, 15 March 2015

Dream a little dream...

We (L and me) managed to catch Roy Andersson's latest film, En duva satt på en gren och funderade på tillvaron (A pigeon sat on a branch reflecting on existance).
I have seen the two previous films in the triology. He is faithful to his very own unique style. I think people either like (a lot) or dislike (a lot) his style. I find him a humanist. I thought the film was awful at times and very funny at times.

So completely different to the film we saw a few days prior. Kingsman. My goodness. So much violence!!! And still, I enjoyed it. I usually cannot stand violent films, and I am usually against the use of violence in most films as it seems to be what so many films are about. Normalizing violence. It feels so awkward to say I enjoyed Kingsman, as it is a very violent film.

Today I dreamed about when my other rooms are ready...then me and my friends shall sit in my livingroom (to be) in candlelight, sip on some sherry or port, listen to jazz on my old grammophone, one of those you have to wind up, eat some bebe-pastries (small delicious pastries with a crusty base, filled with vanillacream and topped off with a lid of frosting) and just be. What would life be without visions and dreams. Not all are meant to be fullfilled, but one has to have dreams and visions in life to find a direction...
This silly little dream shall be fulfilled. I love to sip on port (I seldom do, but still...) and I love homemade bebe-pastries, and I happen to have a grammophone and old jazz records and the most wonderful friends and my livingroom will be so wonderful once it is ready...
I've always been a dreamer and had my visions... sometimes, even years later I might even become a wee bit scared when I realize that so many of the things I've dreamed of have become true. I have never been afraid of tackling and going towards my dreams. We, the ones who are privileged to say things like this out loud, we have a chance to live a pretty damn good life. And for me that means to be thankful. For everything I have! And that we so often take for granted. A home. Friends. Love. Health. Work. Money. Time to dream. And so much more! All in random order.

Sunday evening. Time to say goodbye to yet anohter wonderful weekend.

Time also to complete my letter to my dear friend G. He is an inmate in an american prison. We have been penpals and friends for a long time. We have become very close. In this friendship I have a responsability to not give him hope, he is on deathrow. And I also have responsability in not making him fall in love with me. For ex. I like to be gentle in my words, but there is a risk, and I must be clear if I use tender words. Because in my opinion this is not the place to make your selfasteem grow, to make someone dream of you and in their mind picture you as a dreampartner, the same way as there is a risk if a person is internet dating. If you are the slightest desperate or have very low selfasteem, you can easily make up a dream-partner and even fall in love without ever having met the other person. We all have heard of the most absurd stories of how inmates marry persons they've never met.
But there's no such risk anymore as we have been friends for a long time. G is one of the most caring people I know. And his humour, well, he is very funny. But it makes my heart very heavy, as there are days when he has no reason to get up.
You must all by now know that I am a hundred percent against death penalty. Everyone screws up. A lot of young kids in america screw up at a very young age, there are guns and there are drugs and there are gangs. A world I know very little about. But I do not want to feel sorry for my dear friend G. That does not help him. I rather feel sympathy, and I care.
Our correspondance is not about his committed crime, nor do I write about my opinion regarding deathrow.
There are so many other things to write about. Believe me. It's the sort of friendship I will value for the rest of my life. Everytime I receive a letter from dearest G, I always try to save it like a treat. And what joy it is to read. He has a tremendous gift in writing. So if any of you are interested in starting a correspondance with a prisoner, please be in touch, I can give you more information if you wish.
Obviously, it is wise to remember that once you start, you should stick to it. As you might become a very important friend. So it is good to think of what sort of commitment you make.And obviously one does not have to choose an inmate on deathrow if it feels too heavy to tackle.

Above is a picture from last year when I was in Italy. My friends are walking there, in the sun! A few months later we met up in Berlin. And walked in the sun.
It has been so sunny of late. A few years back, when I was involved with an eu-project, we had a meeting in Turkey and we stayed on for some days in Istanbul and we had booked this wonderful hotel that had a terrace overlooking the Bosphorus, we enjoyed looooong breakfasts on the terrace, in the sun. Spring bloomed when we were there. The cherrytrees were in bloom and tulips. I flew home to Helsinki and the next day I flew to Berlin for a short holiday. And spring bloomed when I was there, we sat outdoors eating brekfast and lunch, we sat in parks and cykled. That year I experienced spring three times!


Friday, 13 March 2015

Friday the 13th, part two

I made a little gift for my loved one.

It says härligt. A word we use frequently. It means lovely. And that is what everything is. 
We are. Life is. 

Friday the 13th

I found the little rug at the flea market, my heart and tummy filled with warmth and love, as I came to think of the dearest man I know and his inherited beautiful lace tablecloths, his granny has crocheted loads! Sad not to have the name of the person who made it. 

Friday the 13th. Always been a favorite combo. Lucky day! I even met L for the first time friday the 13th. Little did I know we would end up loving each other. 

Happy weekend all you lovelies out there!

Monday, 9 March 2015

Spring... in the air! Spring is in light! Spring is on everybody's tongue! Spring is in the headlines!

The sun is out and it is warm. People are transforming!
I want to plant flowers, I want to plant herbs, I want to plant sunflowers!

Sunday, 1 March 2015

Then there was a...

... windmill!
I found the painting at the fleamarket. It has a portrait painted on the reverse side. That used to be custom for artists to do, to either paint over a previous painting, or turn the canvas.
I shall keep this for now, maybe one day I shall turn the canvas as the portrait is beautiful. On the fleamarket pricetag it said "Local windmill". We have a beautiful windmill, just a few hundred meters away from my house, it stands tall. I took a picture of it at christmas. It could in fact be the exact same windmill. The painting is not signed, so I do not know if it is by a local artist.

On friday me and L went to see a local band play. Very few turned up. But the band gave their best, they even played an encore for us. Me and L spontaneously ended up for a few drinks at a nightclub. And a certain someone even sang a karaokesong, hih;)

On saturday we had a date, we saw a really silly swedish movie called Micke och Veronika, and then we had dinner. What a great saturday!

And the weekend continues with yet another movie, tonight I shall see The Imitation game. All my friends have spoken only well of the film.

Have a wonderful sunday!

Sunday, 22 February 2015


I've had a week of winterholiday. And what did I do? I attended a course at Teatteri Metamorfoosi, from monday to friday. We concentrated on clown work, including methods used by French-Guatemalan artist Mario Gonzalez’ theatre games. The game is very strict, it has many rules and gives you a frame to move within. During the week I slowly got acquinted with my new friend, Lilli, as seen above. 

It was so much fun and so interesting. To work with physical theatre again, neutral masque and clown. Each night I fell asleep happy. 

 Once again. Life is good!

Sunday, 15 February 2015


I watched The Notebook film tonight. Oh my does it make me cry. I think it's really lovely, sort of reminds me of my parents. My mother has alzheimer. There are very good days, and there are less good days, and there are days. She very often asks my dad to tell her how they met. In fact, many times a day. In the film the lady has dementia. Here's the trailer.
I love the song featured in the film, I'l be seeing you, by the one and only Billie Holiday.

And as I was in a kind of sentimental mood, I was about to write my darling a good night text, as he is far away at the moment. And right then, when I'm writing him, he calls me. I wasn't expecting that! And I started to cry. Because I was so happy. Because I miss him like crazy. Because I love him!
Soon he'll be back home again!

I need to get up early. I have a course to attend. I'll tell you more about that later. Sleep well!

Above is a picture from my favorite café, Tuhannen tuskan kahvila. It was the first café I went to when I moved to this small town. I lived just a few houses away and in the weekends, I sat in their garden and read the paper and had breakfast. Liisa, the owner, always stayed for a while by my table and talked to me. I didn't know anyone. And it was just so lovely, the next time I came back, she remembered me. She even remembered some things I had told her. It made me feel so welcome and since then, the café and Liisa has a special place in my heart.

Restaurant day

Today is restaurant day in Finland. Small pop up restaurants and cafés open for just today.

I shall visit at least two!

Above is my bedroom in sunlight. The sun is out, so let's go get blinded by it! Happy sunday folks!

Saturday, 14 February 2015

Valentine's day, internet-bullying and racism

I have to confess I am not much of a fan of Valentines day. For me personally, the only romance I need and wish for is the everyday romance. In the form of flowers when not expected. You know the "just because I love you" -bouquets! Spontaneous gifts. The whispered love words and compliments, the glances, the smile and the happy eyes that greet me when we meet. The loving compliments about my looks and about my clothing. Kind gestures. Laughter. Kind words. Encouragement. The wishing well.
Obviously I wish to be remembered when there is an occasion. But to only receive flowers and a hint of romance on Valentines day, then I would be dissapointed!
I also give flowers and gifts, I do not think it is only for the male to be the giver. L has been very happy everytime he has received flowers. So girls, give your spouses flowers!

I also try to think about how much fun am I as a girlfriend or spouse. Am I considerate? Am I loving? Generous? Am I making life easy for the one I love. Do I show and tell how much I appreciate my partner? Do I live accordinly to what I wish for? Do I compliment my partner on his looks and his clothing.

I am thankful that we spend time with each other. We turn our technical equipment off when together. I love it that L suggests things to do, the other day he suggested we see an exhibition together and made dinner together and then decided to just stay home, we lay in bed talking and laughing and loving each other. I also appreciate that we both have our own hobbies and interests. But we also have a few weekly hobbies in common. We play badminton. It is so much fun and something we both prioritize.

When L was going through his divorce, which turned ugly as his ex-wife decided to make it public on her blog and on facebook. She even wrote, it would have been easier had he died. Had she been a man, it would have been considered violence. Now she painted herself as a victim.
What happened was, instead of having a community turn against us, we received so much unexpected support and so much love from people we didn't even know! Everywhere we went, seriously, people came up to us and said encouraging words. And when she decided to publish my name and link to my blog, I received over a hundred comments from people I had never met, that asked me to try see beyond her violence but stay true to my rights. I received so much supposrt from blogfriends and my IRL friends. Thank you so much! She eventually did remove the link and my name. She still claims she had a right to do so, you know, freedom of speech blah-blah-blah. How about ethics and moral? It is extremely selfish. Even if she has removed the actual post, it is still out there. Nothing you can ever delete..and it has a name: internet-bullying.
It all started with a picture of flowers I had posted on my blog. She thought they were a bouquet from L. And she stated her right: due to the fact that I post about my happiness and my love, she has a right to post about lost love and her unhappiness. And hence a right to publish my name and link to my blog. The flowers. They were from my mother.

She has luckily stopped following my blog and she no longer writes comments and messages to me, probably due to the fact she herself has found love and does not have the time nor the interest anymore. She has finally managed to move on in her life and I wish her and her boyfriend much happiness. See what a little love can do! Hallelujah!

Freedom of speech. I am a defender of it. But in the name of it, people say and write the most awful things. Take the N-word. It is out there. It exists. But why do people feel the right to use it. The N-word is racist. It is a fact. By using it, you are racist. And in my opinion extremely stupid. It is not YOUR right to choose and decide WHAT IS and WHAT IS NOT racist. And why is that? Because you are not the one with the measure-ecquipment!You are not the one who has had to live with racist attitudes.
Usually white people who incist on using the N-word, feel they need to defend the usage of the word, and also adding, but I'm not racist if I do use it, because, (and this is in my opinion the most ridiculus part!)  I would never use it in front of a coloured person. Then why use it at all? Because I can! I have a right to use any word I want. Yes of course, but where lies your morals? We all have a right to say and do things, but because of MORALS and ETHICS we do not. Because as humans, we can use our brain to think logically, to be critical, to make conclusions, we can decide, we can choose not to offend, not to provoke. That we can see further, that by giving up on racist attitudes and language, we ourselves, contribute to a better world. We can also change. The way we looked at the world hundred years ago, is not the way we today look at the world and humans. A lot has changed. The same way as we don't go around saying everything we think out loud. Because we have been taught good manners. And language can and should change. Attitudes can and should change. It is called growing. Becoming aware. Awarness is key.
And how offensive isn't that sort of behaviour, double standard. RACIST. As if by accepting the fact our culture is racist, and by holding on to these power-structures with nails and teeth, with aggressive and dogmatic reasons, we give in  and our lives would be less free? With white priviledges comes responsability. To admit racism exist. In our culture and in our language. To use responsability to try change, to try educate. To try make poeple open their eyes to priviledge. And to accept that in order to make change, I may have to give up on some of my priviledges. This part is not easy. And I am by no means a good example, because I cannot confess to having given up on my priviledges so far. But I confess to try accept I live in a racist culture. It makes me sick at times. I feel ashamed. I also make mistakes, for ex. I often try to not see colour, where there is colour.
If you want to learn more about racism and about power, please watch wonderful Aamer Rahman.

In Finland Valentines day is friend day. I like that. I have been blessed with very very dear friends. Thank you all. I love you and I am grateful for our friendship. Tack! Kiitos! Thank you! Merci!

I received Valentine's Day flowers from my darling. They were much appreciated!

Above is another nude vintage postcard from early 1900. I belive it is a 20's card. French. You know I have a vast collection of french cards. Most of them still tucked away in boxes...