Tuesday, 28 June 2011
I must say, I did not know before I wrote my previous post, that the sore memory of betraying my mother at the age of seven, could actually be healed.
Thanks to comments made by P.K. , Agneta and Jackie, my inner seven yrs old is no longer feeling guilt and the memory has taken on a new form.
Those comments were the best thing my inner seven yrs old could have. She needed someone who gave the exact right words, so that she could let go of guilt.
I have always trusted that if you are brave enough to show your vulnerability and be honest, you will be met with love. And this proves it.
I found my old Art Garfunkel cd. I have been singing along to this.
Last night I tried to call a special someone to sing a song on the phone. He had tried to call me twice last night when I was at dance-class. I tried again once I got home. I still have not sung:(
Sunday, 26 June 2011
I was seven years old. I wanted to say something beautiful to my teacher. The most beautiful thing I could think of in that moment was "I wish you were my mother".
They were not the best choice of words! First of all, I did not wish her to be my mother. And secondly, I felt I betrayed my mother even though I didn´t mean what I said. Terrible dilemma for a seven year old. I can still feel how that memory twists inside me.
I cannot for the life of me remember what my teacher replied.
Thursday, 23 June 2011
Tuesday, 21 June 2011
Sunday, 19 June 2011
Last night I attended a nightride on bike along the shores of Helsinki organised by Helsinki Night Bike-Riders. A beautiful sunset for almost 200 attendants! We ended the ride at Kalasatama and I enjoyed green tea and a slice of quiche at Ihana kahvila. There were two DJ´s and I danced for a few hrs to great music in the beautiful night. What a fun event!
Unfortunately I didn´t take my camera with me last night, but the pic above is from Kalasatama that I took a few weeks ago.
Monday, 13 June 2011
Well, to be honest, rainy days and mondays do not get me down. It just happens to be very suitable today, well you might have guessed by now, it is monday aaaaand it´s, yes, go on, say it, it´s r...a...i..ning! Well done!
It was a very humid weekend, I enjoyed every moment of it. I had friends over on saturday, both during the day and in the evening. I mainly entertained guests in the garden! I served plenty of ice-cream, strawberries, ice-tea, coffee, sparkling wine and sangria.
This youtube clip of Porkka Playboys cover of Bohemian Rhapsody has become a hit in Finland. It is great fun! Enjoy!
Friday, 10 June 2011
Helsinki is a wonderful summer-city.
Yesterday I rode my bike along the shore to meet up with my knitting-group. And rode the same route back and saw a spectacular sunset. Unfortunately my camera run out of battery after the shot above, so you just have to take my word for it - it was fantastic! It´s very very hot here in Helsinki and humid, perfect weather for cykling.
Today I had a shiatsu-massage. After the massage I enjoyed vegan lunch with a dear friend. What a wonderful summer day. Now I shall spend some more quality time with darling K.
Have a wonderful weekend!
Wednesday, 8 June 2011
We´ve had guests daily and received plenty of gifts and flowers. On monday we had a lovely guest whom we both wished could have stayed longer longer longer. I painted my nails red, wore lipstick and flowers in my hair. I slept in his arms. And darling K slept in his clothes;) And once he left the next day, I felt that feeling again that somehow could relate to longing. I felt it last time he was here and he left and I wrote about it here.
We have a heatwave in Finland. It is really hot! + 30 degrees C in the shadow!!!! So plenty of water, fruits and ice-cream! In fact, I´m going to have another ice-cream!
Saturday, 4 June 2011
My darling K has settled in well. We´ve had absolutely no problems at all. Well, a minor incident that perhaps could be worth mentioning...this morning when I flushed the toilet I noticed it sounded slightly different and emmediately noticed my toilet freshener was gone. How could it be possible as I´ve kept the lid closed. So I figured my darling K has managed to loosen it from the outside. I called the plumber. He arrived and in the end he had to remove the toilet seat and eventually we found the toilet freshener! It cost me 250 euros so I guess I shall not be using them again!
She is very sweet and warm and loves to be near me, and I´m certain we shall have a very happy life together. Thank you for all your kind comments and wishes. She has already given me so much joy and love and I cannot think of life without her. She really has melted my heart.
We´ve also had guests and at first she was a little shy and scared, but today she even slept in my friends lap!
Above is a little letterscale from my childhood. And origami I´ve made from old booksheets. A little stilleben where I used to have my "enormous" glassdome. I´ve packed it away for the time beeing until darling K has settled in properly and knows her way around. She is very curious and wants to explore places. She is still very cautious. It is such fun to see how how she no longer gets scared if my phone rings or my neighbours walk in the hallway, we said hello to them last night as she had been "on call" everytime she heard a noise form behind the front door. Now she doesn´t really pay any attention to them.
She also played with me today. I´ve tried different toys without any success but today I tossed a ball back and forth and eventually she started chasing it. I was also quite happy to find she has played with my toiletroll, I mean that she finds pleasure even if it is only toiletpaper (and obviously with the toilet refresher). She will be more playful as time goes by and that makes me happy.
Wednesday, 1 June 2011
Today Kille moved in with me. She is adopted from the catshelter in Helsinki.
She is obviously a little nervous but all has gone remarkably well. Let´s keep our fingers crossed she will settle in well. She is very charming. She sounds like an old engine so loud she purrs. Not all that fond of her name...but I assume I can always give her a nickname.